


Part 2

by WinterReadingerDixon67



Series: Love is Strength, Not a Weakness [2]
Category: Marvel, Marvel (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Bucky Barnes Feels, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Bucky Barnes Remembers, Emotional Hurt, F/M, Feels, Hearing Voices, Heavy Angst, Hurt Bucky Barnes, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, Love is strength, Not a Weakness, Please send me stuff, So many emotions, Wrote this instead of paying attention in class, why do I always do this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-17
Updated: 2016-10-17
Packaged: 2018-08-23 02:32:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,225
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8310379
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WinterReadingerDixon67/pseuds/WinterReadingerDixon67
Summary: Bucky loves the reader, but is scared to hurt her, he’s conflicted with the voices in his head, so he ends up pushing her away. Which makes the voices only stronger.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Because I really wanted to post the next part, because I love you all! It's a little short sorry.

~ “Well you’ll never know unless you try.” ~

 

My head shoots up and I freeze where I’m standing. (Y/N) was standing in the doorway, her arms wrapped around herself. She dropped her arms and made her way towards me. But I just moved back, stopping her with my flesh hand. Making sure that my left one was as far away from her as I could get it. 

“Stop, just stop. I don’t want to hurt you.” She doesn’t stop coming towards me. 

“I know you won’t hurt me, I trust you.” 

 

_Trust no one, the Winter Soldier doesn’t trust, he takes orders. Trust is a sign of love, love is a form of weakness. What do you do soldier?_ ** _I only take orders._** I just laugh at her mockingly, 

“Well, you shouldn’t trust me, not when I could still relapse back to the Winter Soldier.” (Y/N) stops then, a frown formed on her face, but a small smile soon replaced it. 

“And I’ll be here to help bring you back every time. I’m not leaving you, whether you want to love me or not. You’re stuck with me Barnes.” 

 

_ People leave you, your friend left you to die. His friendship with you showed weakness, Love is weakness, it makes you inadequate.  _

 

“YOU JUST DON’T GET IT DO YOU!” I punched the corner wall, knocking out a huge chunk. Watching as it landed on the ground in a heap. I couldn’t get my breathing under control. I could hear the blood pounding in my ears and felt the room shift. I saw the others shrink back out of the corner of my eye. I turned around to face her. “See what I mean?” I point at the others, “I do one thing and everyone sees’s me as a freak machine, a freakin time bomb that’s going to go off any second!” 

 

“Bucky-”

“No, (Y/N). See that?” I look over to where the chunk of wall was missing. “That could’ve been you. What if I was him and that was you? What if I killed you? I WOULD NEVER FORGIVE MYSELF!!” I started to turn away, only for (Y/N) to grab my arm and swing me around to face her. Her face red and anger flashed in her eyes. 

“And I’ll never forgive myself if you died either James Buchanan Barnes. I’ll never forgive myself of how you became so lost, that there was nothing I could do to bring you back to me. That there might’ve been something that I could’ve done. Hurt me all you want, but what hurts me the most is that you won’t accept that I love you for you. Not him!” She sighed and took my hands into hers. I try to pull my left one away from her, but she holds it tighter. “Dammit Bucky, you’re not the only one who thinks that everything that they touch dies. My jerk of an ex-boyfriend taught me that. But once I got to know you, you’ve helped me see that I can help. So please, just let me in so I can.”

 

_ Do not let people in. Letting people in shows you care, caring shows love, love shows weakness. The Winter Soldier is not weak, he does not care. He does not love. Sadly you showed you cared for that man.  _ **_I d-didn’t I swear._ ** _ Let’s remind you why love is a form of weakness.  _ The voices sounded closer than they ever were. I felt myself start to slip as if I was falling. I frantically searched for something for me to hold onto, to keep myself from slipping. 

 

_ Second guessing yourself already? That’s not a good sign, shows that you’re slipping. Shows that you’re weak. We don’t always have to use your trigger words, Sergeant Barnes. We can always hurt you in different ways. Wipe him. _ **_N-No, please._ ** It felt as though the voices were here with me in the room, everything else was muffled over. I covered my ears, trying to quieten them. I fall to my knees and the next thing I knew everyone was moving around me. 

_ Give into the pain Mr. Barnes, it’ll only make it worse if you cower from it. Cowering is a form of weakness. The Winter Soldier is not weak.  _ **_Please stop, please!_ **

 

“Stop, please. Just make them go away. Make them s-stop.” I shrink back into myself, doing the complete opposite of what the voices were telling me to. I jumped when I felt soft hands place themselves on top of mine. I squeezed my eyes tight, afraid of what I might see. 

“Make what stop Bucky? What do you want to go away?” I shake my head, trying to jostle the voices, but they kept coming. 

 

_ Soldier, what is love?  _ **_Love is weakness_ ** _ Who loves you?  _ **_No one_ ** _ What does love show you?  _ **_I’m weak_ ** _ Who are you, Soldier?  _ **_I’m the Winter Soldier, Fist of Hydra_ ** _ And what are you?  _ **_I’m not weak, the Winter Soldier is not weak_ ** _ Good, now let’s show the others how cold you truly are.  _

 

“They keep talking to me, they noticed I’m weak. They’re going to wipe me again.” 

“James, James listen to me, you need to trust me. Whatever they’re telling you isn’t true. Don’t believe them.” 

 

_ Trust is a form of love, love is a form of weakness. Don’t trust anyone. Those you trust are there to kill you.  _ I’m not sure what happened next, but something inside me snapped. My hand grabbed the nearest thing next to me and pulled them towards me. 

 

“Love is weakness, it doesn’t make you strong. It leaves you inadequate. The Winter Soldier doesn’t trust, he doesn’t care, he just takes orders. Trust is a form of love, love is a form of weakness. The Winter Soldier is not weak.” 

I could feel them struggle against my hold on their neck, I could feel their life start to wither away. I felt someone yank me from behind, but I was quicker. I swung the person from in front of me at them, knocking them over. I stalked towards them but felt someone wrap their legs around my neck and bring me to the ground. I heard muffled yelling coming all around me, but I was too deep in a haze to understand what the words were. I struggled against the hold on me, I tried to untangle the legs from me, only to find out that my arms were being held down. I looked over to my left arm, to notice a hammer placed on top of my hand holding it down. 

“Bucky! Bucky this isn’t you. You’re not the Winter Soldier, you’re not him. He has no control over you. Those voices do not control you!” I try lashing my legs to those holding my arm down, but they were quickly stopped by a band of red holding them down. I was quickly immobile. I could no longer move. They noticed I was weak, they came back for me. They were going to wipe me again. 

_ You were doing so well asset, but don’t worry, you won’t feel a thing when I’m done with you.  _

“Please, please no. I wasn’t weak, I tried not to, please don’t wipe me again.” I whimpered against their hold on me, scared of what was to come. 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Comments and Requests are always welcome! :)


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